So either start stoning rape victims to death for not screaming loud enough (Deuteronomy 22:23-24) or shut the fuck up about what “the bible says.”
* ALL NIGHT VALE CITIZENS AND STREXCORP EMPLOYEES MUST ATTEND. ALL MUST ATTEND. HENCE THE WORD MANDATORY. WOW DO YOU NOT READ? WHY DID WE HIRE YOU? WHY DID WE EVEN MAKE THIS POSTER? WE DON’T KNOW. GO ASK THE SMILING GOD. GO ASK HIM MANY THINGS. WE ARE WATCHING.
Company flier for StrexCorp’s first (mandatory) annual company picnic!
Kappa (river imp)
Jorōgumo (lit. “whore spider”)
Kubire-oni (strangler demon)
Rokurokubi (long-necked woman)
Onmoraki (bird demon)
Nekomata (cat monster)
Tengu (bird-like demon)
Tenjō-sagari (ceiling dweller)
Enma Dai-Ō (King of Hell)
Kyūbi no kitsune (nine-tailed fox)
Baku (dream-eating chimera)
Yamasei (mountain sprite)
Rashōmon no oni (ogre of Rashōmon Gate)
Waira (mountain-dwelling chimera)
Nure-onna (snake woman)
They drive past the Moonlight All-Night, a glass box of bad food and good people. They pass Teddy Williams’ Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex, badly damaged by the war, but still running its weekly bowling league. They pass by City Hall, which is covered in a yellow tarp, stamped with an orange triangle. Moving farther out, with absolute purpose, they pass by the Used Car Lot – alive with the wolves that populate all car lots at night – and Old Woman Josie’s house, silent and empty for months now.
Then the town is behind them, and they are in the Scrub Lands and the Sand Wastes.
They stop the car and get out. Pebbles crunch in the sand in response to their movement. The radio murmurs behind the closed doors of the car. The headlights illuminate only a few stray plants and the wide, dumb eyes of some nocturnal animal.
Welcome to Night Vale
Episode 45 - A Story About Them(via nightvalequotes)
Oh Bacon, my bacon. Our delicious trip is done. I ate my fill, my plate is clean and now my beloved bacon is gone.